I edit menus, shaking my head when reading "fresh" to modify eggs and "freshly brewed" to define coffee. Do they need to tell us it's not stale or old?
A sign reads, "Great bread for everybody." What is great bread? If you wanted an item "homemade" why go to a restaurant? Food should sparkle with taste. Why add "tasty" to an item?
Stacked adjectives confuse readers. So many added unnecessary modified words get in the way of the message. Whew, breathe. Can you hold your breath long enough for: a roasted turkey Fuji apple salad. But wait . . . The wording continues - Tossed with white balsamic Fuji apple vinagrette.
What if Fuji apples danced with turkey twirled in vinagrette?
If adjectives appear on the menu, they must excite or astonish the noun. Let them add spice.
Another menu item I've seen: artisan bread baked fresh. What does that mean? Bread with designs on the crust? "Simply delicious" adds nothing. What's the meaning of baked fresh? Fruitcakes are the only breads that age with grace.
Creative Write: Just for fun, choose a menu in need of enchantment. Discover ways to revitalize it with nouns and verbs. Add imagery with scents and tastes. Describe the swish of celery when chewed. Cinnamon and nutmeg your sentences. Unroll a sauce or pudding like satin to the palate. Show how the texture tingles the tongue bumps.
Omit the obvious: fresh, tasty, homemade, just baked. Go outrageous with description to tempt the reader's appetite. Revel in outrageous to make the reader salivate.
How would you energize:
Almond chicken salad on sesame semolina with all natural antiobiotic free chicken, diced celery, grapes almonds and secret sauce. Let these ingredients out to play!
Grab the taste buds with a chicken dizzied by dijon with a dapple of almonds.
Tempt with mozzarella and tomato on focaccia bread. Do they melt in a tango?
Soup in a bread bowl definitely needs attention. Let the peas sail among potato clouds.
Go ahead. Play with your food.
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